Parents Day is a unparalleled event that is eagerly anticipated by every member of the Durham family. Why? Is it the food? The music? What makes Parents Day so magical?
For some parents, it’s the first time they’ve ever been to Durham. Picture the scene; Their son has been living in this foreign obscure environment and seems to have thrived or at least found some measure of comfort, but what is it about this place that’s so enthralling? Sure, there are no rules, no pressure, no responsibilities... but how is any of that stuff going to effect real change? How do I reconcile this fairytale wonderland some of the other parents describe with the stories I’ve heard and what I’ve experienced? It’s with tentative curiosity that they make the trip to Durham and aren’t quite sure what to expect. They arrive on campus and are met with a lively cheerful energetic scene and watch some of the veteran parents confidently make their way up the hill and jump into the fray of hugs and greetings. They notice another first time couple standing a bit unsurely to the side and they might breath a sigh of relief. They make eye contact with them, share The Look, and begin their ascent to the Beis. They are met with a whirlwind of positivity and excitement. “Oh my gosh! You must be so-and-so’s parents. He looks just like you!” “This is my sons third year here. What grade is your son in?” “11th grade?Wow! Rabbi Wisnicki? He’s the best!” They meet their sons Rebbe, finally putting a face to the name, their sons dorm counselors and friends. All of whom, seem to be completely enamored with their son. Slowly they start to acclimate to the warm environment and the tension slowly begins to fade. There is an overflowing feeling of positivity and happiness. There’s some inexplicable vitality that the very campus is pulsating with. Almost as if each smile, each greeting, each hug, breathes more life into the atmosphere. There’s a certain vibrancy in the air that spreads to every corner of the campus and wipes away any lingering reservations. They’re slowly starting to comprehend what Durham is all about.
For other parents, returning to Durham means reconnecting with the environment they know well and love. It’s such a joy to watch their son in his element, comfortably conversing with friends and proudly introducing them to anyone and everyone. They get to spend time with other parents who have shared their journey with them. They also meet some new parents exchange stories and encouragement. Yes they know what Durham is all about, but somehow seeing it in person still blows their minds.
The experience varies greatly among the guys as well. Many are hopeful that their parents will come and truly recognize their accomplishments and are looking forward to their parents seeing them in this environment where every part of them is valued and appreciated. They know how greatly the experience can impact their parents view of them. Many a parent has walked away from Parents Day thinking “wow- my son has a lot of really impressive friends.” Or “wow- Everyone knows his name! I’m so glad he’s not slipping through the cracks.”
Others look forward to meeting their friends parents for this exact reason; so they can impart their unbiased perspective of him as simply amazing. They embark on parents day with a mission to make others comfortable and happy. It’s truly remarkable.
Many of the dorm counselors and Rebbeim gain a renewed appreciation for the fact that each person comes from a huge complex world. Each person has others who depend on him. Who worry about him. Who care about him. People who are constantly busy thinking about how he’s doing. In getting a window into the parents journey they are amazed and astounded at the commitment, care, and love that each parent displays time and time again. They get to hear about the parents that go above and beyond, not only for their own son, but for the entire Waterbury network within their own communities. Every year the parents never cease to amaze.
And neither do the guys. The talent in Durham is on full display in all of its undimmed glory. Hours of musical performances, each one better than the next leave everyone wondering; does Durham have a monopoly on musical talent or is it simply given encouragement and a stage on which to express itself?
No one leaves Parents Day the same way they arrived. This celebration of growth, of life, of possibility, of accomplishment, of friendship; leaves its glowing mark on all who participate.
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Parents Day Musical Performances